“God Is Here Among Us”

(Matthew 18:15-20)

If your brother or sister sins against you, go and point out the fault when the two of you are alone.  If you are listened to, you have regained that one.  But if you are not listened to, take one or two others along with you, so that every word may be confirmed by the evidence of two or three witnesses.  If that person refuses to listen to them, tell it to the church, and if the offender refuses to listen even to the church, let such a one be to you as a gentile and a tax collector.  Truly I tell you, whatever you bind on earth will be loosed in heaven.  Again, truly I tell you, if two of you agree on earth about anything you ask, it will be done for you by my Father in heaven.  For where two or three are gathered in my name, I am there among them.”

            If the Christian church in America should go extinct, it might just die on the hill of what goes on in church kitchens.  When I began my tenure in Wellington 19 years ago, I was quickly instructed about the kitchen rules.  It was to be locked at all times unless there was a church event going on in the dining room.  Now the idea of locking the kitchen just flew all over me.  I was coming from this church where the kitchen is the hub of our socializing.  Back in the day we even had an adult Sunday School class called “Around the Kitchen Table.”  In our church here one must pass through that important room in order to get anywhere….  “Locking a church kitchen?  Well, we’ll see about that…,” I naively thought.

            Well, you can imagine that I and a few others who shared my view were shot down pretty quickly.  The kitchen remained locked and still is, I’m sure.

            The next disagreement was around the dishes that were used by the people who cooked for the Kiwanis Club every week.  They had bought a 20 piece setting of Fiestaware (seconds, I’m sure) to use for the Kiwanis lunches.  This came to be because they did not want to use the very outdated, very high maintenance church china.  Understandable.

            Well, at some point some of us had started a once-a-month dinner for senior citizens in town and didn’t want to put more plastic and paper into the landfill and certainly didn’t want to use the church china….  So we were using the Fiestaware!  Suddenly we noticed that the Fiestaware was nowhere to be found.  Gone!  Disappeared!  Their worst fears must have come true.  Someone from the AA meeting had taken it all home!  Or one of those folks who came through the church to the food pantry that was open every morning had wandered in to an unlocked kitchen, had seen those colorful dishes and had escaped with them!  This was just what the kitchen folk had warned us about.  These people coming through the church will get in the kitchen, and they will take things.

            Truth is, I had a pretty good idea of what had happened to the dishes.  I knew that the group who cooked for Kiwanis and kept the money and used it only for the projects they wanted, decided they would hide the colorful dishes in an out of the way place in church.  The church secretary had seen the boxes somewhere, though, so the kitchen crew decided to transport the dishes to an unknown location and, then, bring them in only for their own use.

Well, I admit that I didn’t handle that situation perfectly.  In my angry state I asked to meet with two of the kitchen folks.  I began by saying, “Someone has stolen the Fiestaware.  Have you all noticed and have you looked for the dishes?”  Pretty quickly they admitted that they had taken the dishes off the premises for “safekeeping.”

            I told them that when something was bought with church money (all the money raised by a church group belongs to the whole church), when that something is brought into the church, it can and will be used for church purposes.  Further, I said, don’t bring it back unless you’re willing to abide by those rules.  We didn’t see the Fiestaware again, and a member of the other group, the anti-Fiestaware, bought a set of dishes to be used for that and anything else that happened on the church premises!

            So, you see, there really is nothing new under the sun.  There is always something going on, even in the most joyful, laidback churches.  Matthew’s community was having their disagreements, and they must have been longing to know how Jesus would have wanted them to handle things.  What would Jesus do?  So, they thought back on certain things he had said about managing community disputes while he was walking the earth. 

What we need to see in our text today is not that disagreements should drive the losers out of the fold.  No, disagreements need to be handled in such a way that all of us are kept in the fold.  Problems need to be handled at the same time that we preserve the community and we reconcile a member who may have strayed.  I like to use this language when we are dealing with conflicts and differences.  Let’s build a container and strive to be that container, that church, that is strong enough to hold us all. 

            Sometimes, if taken out of context, this reading from Matthew can be used as a way to kick difficult people out when the way it should be interpreted is that grace and forgiveness have no end.  Sure, we know that there are times when a church body is left with no other option than setting a hard boundary, but our guidelines in today’s text assures, if they are followed, that there is no arbitrariness and no hasty, knee-jerk reactions. 

The leader is protected from her own prejudices and hasty reactions.  The congregation is guarded from disruption and from the slow burn of unresolved disagreements or behavior.

            The other thing we need to know about this text is that Jesus is coming at it from a community standpoint, as opposed to our modern approach which always makes it about the individual.  Should the community be being hurt by one person’s behavior, then an intervention needs to happen.  But that intervention needs to be kind and loving and patient, and compassionate. 

            The thing is, in the church of Jesus Christ there can be no one who is outside the care of the community, no one may be isolated.  We know that Jesus ate with tax collectors and Gentiles, so when he says this about the person who is causing problems, they should be to us as tax collectors and Gentiles, he means we hang in with them.  Even if we have to tell them a hard no, we never treat them as though they are outside God’s love and care.  So this whole thing is about how we are to be the body of Christ in the world.  And it’s hard, and we need guidelines, not ones that give us carte blanche to decide who’s in or who’s out of the Body of Christ, but, rather, we need ways of doing things that preserve some order.  That’s what Jesus’ words in today’s reading are doing for us—giving us guidance, preserving order. 

            Another example: In the past there was a situation in a group in which one person was running their mouth too much and putting down the leader of the group.  I witnessed it but, being young and green, I didn’t know how to handle it in a way that was respectful and loving to all the players.  Unbeknownst to me, one of the group members took it upon themselves to go to the person causing the unrest and speak privately.  As I heard about it later, the perpetrator saw the error of their ways, and the situation got better—not perfect—but better.  It was a memorable example for me of how this text can work for the good of all.

            So, here’s the bottom line about this piece of scripture, there is no point at which we can say to another, “You are out.”  We must endeavor in the most loving, inclusive way, to work to resolve our dilemmas.  There is no limit to forgiveness.  Now, remember we must be both innocent as doves, but wise as serpents.   We still keep the guardrails up regarding the safety of our community and our children.  But we must never withhold God’s love and forgiveness.  Even if the person separates themselves, they must never feel separated from God’s love and ours.  Now, these are difficult realities to hold at the same time, but it’s what Jesus is calling us to. 

            Oh, I can think of other situations through the years when I have withheld my love, and as a pastor, must have communicated that withholding, from someone who had stepped over the line of acceptable behavior into the unacceptable and hurtful.  They can be as a tax collector or outsider, but, remember, those are exactly who Jesus sat down with and welcomed into the fold.  And the thing is, who knows if we’ll be the next ones to be needing a talking to or an intervention.  Wouldn’t you want it to be a compassionate experience? 

            Jesus’ assurance to us at all times and in all situations is where today’s lesson ends: “Where two or three are gathered in Christ’s name, he will be among us.”   Amen.